broken.

I am just broken.
There's nothing left to fix in me.
Sometimes I think that I have found the way out of me, sometimes I want to
believe that I have no more tears to cry, that somehow there still room to try.
That I can stand on my own and be, but that is just the lies I tell myself
because I am broken as anyone else can see.

I am like a broken toy,
that the parent is tired of gluing back together, that the child is bored with
pretending that these cracks are somehow better, that the glue will cover
the flaws that show through always and ever, that the stories I want to
tell will lessen those moments when I fail and fall back down to the
ground in pieces as the child cries, the parent sighs and I tell myself
once again that I am broken as another part of me dies.

no more, I cannot take it anymore
I am broken and I am okay with being
broken. Stop trying to fix it or me. Stop trying, shut the door
I want to stop doubting, crying, feeling lost, just no more.